Call me a bit of an oddball, but my hobby isn’t collecting stamps, coins or fine wines. Instead, I collect good phrases and powerful word choices. I’ve always been attracted to language and I’ve spent my entire career understanding the impact of words in the world of business and — more specifically — in the arena of the job search. 

It has always amazed me how much advantage a scientist gains from the ability to speak positively and succinctly about his accomplishments. It’s amazing how much more buy-in an engineer can get from a potential employer when she knows exactly how to summarize her fit at the end of an interview.

Words make a huge difference. And while I’ve never subscribed to the philosophy that you should be primed with prepared answers to interview questions (such as those espoused in books with titles like 100 Snappy Answers to Tough Interview Questions) there are a few areas of career development where a well-crafted choice of words should be an essential part of your preparation.

In this issue’s column, I’ll share some examples with you. While I don’t want to put exact words in your mouth, I do want to encourage you to absorb the flavor of my examples and develop the concept into something that works for you.

Cold Call Networking

Talking to strangers can be uncomfortable. Here’s a typical networking approach made by telephone:

“Good morning Bill, I’m Susan Finnegan. I recently met your sales rep for this region, Joe Fleming, and he suggested that I be in touch. I have been working in quality engineering and I’m interested in a move to business development. Would it be possible that your company has any sales or B.D. openings that I could apply for?”

This approach is not going to get Susan very far, in part because she pulled out her “are there any openings” card too early. Remember that networking is an information-gathering process, not a direct job-searching technique. Here is an  approach that’s much better for Susan:

“Good morning Bill, I’m Susan Finnegan. I recently met your sales rep for this region, Joe Fleming, and he suggested that I get in touch. Do you have time for a question? Great, thank you, I’ll be brief. I’m currently doing quality engineering, but in the future I’d like to be on the business side of a company, perhaps in sales or business development. The reason I’m calling is to ask you about the transition from engineering to business, as Joe tells me that you went through this yourself. I’m hoping to learn about how others have experienced this move, and what skills companies are looking for in their sales hires. Can you spend a few minutes now, or may I call you at another time?”

People don’t mind talking about themselves when they are asked politely. Many people enjoy it, in fact. In the above example, Susan moves from a tacky “are you hiring?” mode to one that sets the stage for a conversation about Bill’s previous experiences and his views on the hiring process. Yes, she still lets on that it’s an employment-related inquiry, but it’s primarily an information-gathering call — until Bill is intrigued further in the conversation and suggests, “Why don’t you send me a resume and I’ll have a look?” Susan let Bill take the initiative, and that’s important. 

Interview Day

What’s the number one question on interview day? It’s not even a question — it’s a simple request, the infamous, “Tell me about yourself.” Here’s an example of a low-powered but typical response:

“I’m with the Quality Engineering team at over at XYZ Pharma. Our company is working on several cancer biologics, and we’ve recently done a deal with Merck to take two of these into commercial development. Prior to my six years at XYZ, I was completing my Ph.D. studies at State University in the Zang laboratory, where we studied a cascade of issues that lead to degenerative neuro diseases. We have a publication in Cell that elaborates on the nature of this relationship.”

While something like this may be perfectly adequate for a conversation between two scientists with similar interests, it doesn’t answer the question directly, which was to tell me about “YOUrself.” Here’s stronger language, improved by pumping up the “I’s” and losing some of those “we’s:”

“I’m with the Quality Engineering team over at XYZ Pharma, where my role has been to develop quality strategies for implementation on new products. — For example, I’m working with our collaborators at Merck to implement two important bioassays. Previously, as a postdoc in Professor Zang’s lab at State University, I co-authored four papers in the last two years, one of them a Cell paper with shared first author status. At State, and also at XYZ, I’ve always been considered the go-to person for anything that might require an informatics approach or IT skills.”

There’s an irony here that’s worth pointing out. You were likely trained in the academic world, where it’s all about you and your work. There, it’s traditional to say “we” instead of “I”. In the world of the job search — especially in industry — it’s often the “I” that interviewers are looking for. (Of course, because teamwork is valued in companies, you don’t want to throw out all the “we’s.”)

Lastly, always relate your responses to the needs of the company and the person you are talking to! At times, that requires some fancy footwork because you may find as you move through interview day that your prepared response isn’t as on-target as you would like.

How Words with Impact Can Improve a Thank-You Letter

Employers tell me that only about 35-40% of job applicants write in with a “thank you” after the big day. To me, that’s a no-brainer. But the problem with most thank-you notes is that they don’t take advantage of this compact, easily read format. Why not drop in another reminder of the value that you bring to the firm? Here’s an example of what I mean, with a perfectly adequate “thank-you” note:

Dear Bill: I just want to thank you for the time you spent with me yesterday. It was a pleasure to meet you in person and to discuss the position and my fit with your colleagues. I’m looking forward to hearing more, and I assure you that I am interested in furthering the discussion. I think I can bring a lot to ABC Biotech! Thanks again, Susan

Here’s a more powerful version:

Dear Bill: Thank you so much for the time you spent with me yesterday. It was a pleasure to meet you in person and discuss this position and my fit with you and your colleagues. As I thought about this later, I realized that what I’ve been doing at XYZ has a great deal of relevance to your needs at ABC Biotech. For example, my experience here with programming and machine learning systems could prove useful in that fast-track microarray scale-up, especially in the interface with your database developers. I look forward to discussing this with you. Thanks again, Susan

Crafting the Right Message

As I’ve repeated many times over the years, the job search has a preparation stage, an approach stage, and a closing stage. Good preparation should include developing an effective CV as well as cover letters, both of which need solid language to separate you from the pack. You should continually work up powerful word choices that you can deploy to describe yourself when asked. You’ll need those when you are in the approach stage, beginning the networking and informational interview process.

But your word choices will stand out most during the closing stage of your search, when you are one of four applicants who made the cut for the on-site interview. You’ll be remembered by the words you leave behind and by your ability to craft a message that stands out and tells this organization exactly what you bring to the table. 

Good luck! 

David G. Jensen is Managing Director of Kincannon & Reed Executive Search (www.krsearch.com), a leading retained search firm in the biosciences. You can reach Dave at (928) 274-2266 or via [email protected].